Monthly Archives: May 2012


Walking to work a little boy, maybe 7 or 8, scampered up to me on the sidewalk. “Hello,” he said. “Hello,” I said. “I have a TOAD,” he said. Sure enough, he had a toad. What did I have, that measured up to a toad? Nothing.

I wish I was that little boy.

The End.

How did we ever make it this far?

Consider the human child:

– 1 year to walk;
– 2 years to feed itself;
– 5-6 years to a modicum of self-sufficiency;
– 18 years to physical maturity;
– 25 years (a quarter century!) to full brain maturity;
– 65-80 years to emotional maturity (not guaranteed in all specimens – evidently we are not hardwired for this achievement)

Watching both my children grow, I am continually amazed that our species ever made it off the ancient African savanna, through the Ice Ages, &tc.

PICTURED: Nature making short work of a Homo sapiens with kung fu power.

Yet here we are, wreaking revenge on Mother Nature for millenna of abuse with SUVs, the Shanghai Fengpu Industrial Park powered by Wyoming coal, and babies. Lots and lots of babies.

I’m kind of interested in reading more fiction about prehistoric times, some good speculation on just how we managed to survive the caveman-and-club days. I know there are those Clan of the Cave Bear novels. Any others out there you’re aware of that take prehistory as their setting?

This is Pulp XII – Despair

A British school teacher in Pattaya, Thailand, following his arrest for dealing large quantities crystal meth. He will be spending a long, long time in the Bangkok Hilton. The very face of despair:

For the record, when in Thailand, do not become a drug dealer.

Full story on this sad bastard here.